Friday, September 30, 2005
all that had happened.. i have confide to my god-bro, Eugene.. he's someone i known through Her.. we've secretly met up with each other once before, without Her knowing.. and even talk throughout the night and exchange our thoughts of Her.. but of coz.. She became aware of our sudden closeness and knowledge of each other in no time.. well.. needless to say.. he knows about the quarrel.. moreover.. he've both side of the story with him.. he's more to Her side, rather than mine, for she had express herself well enough to make him believe.. i don't care.. She even went to the extent of spreading the heated conversation broadcast all over her blog.. to be specific.. only the small chunk where i am wrong.. and not Hers.. what a meanie.. she even keep mentioning that i called Her a backstabber (which had never happened before and i had never did).. the friendship just deteriorate.. just like this.. she went all out to make others believe that i am the one who is at wrong.. and make herself sounded very hard on herself.. everything seems turning upside down.. what's right is wrong.. what's wrong is right.. i thought that keeping quiet and not letting the rumours of the fading friendship due to her, would at least save some face for both of us.. it's not something to be proud of afterall.. perhaps.. she think other wise..
the beauty exposed ;
Tuesday, September 27, 2005
sometimes.. i do wonder.. does people really aware and appreciate of what you did for them for the past few years.. once.. i had one very close friend of mine.. close as sisters.. usually.. during a friendship, there would be both friends of different character.. for my case.. i am much more sporty and not wordy type of person.. the otherwise.. she's much more indoor and and much more chatty than me.. of coz.. she's good at words.. and moreover.. she's always busily criticizing others most of the time.. my side of friends, my ex-boyfriends wasn't spared either.. though it's rather ridiculous sometimes.. but i kept most of the comments myself and accept her for who she is.. i don't mind.. within this 4-5 years of friendship.. there's only a mere few quarrels occured.. as u would know.. the sparks of the tension origin from her and her critisism habit.. and she was always the one who seek for forgiveness.. everything went alright.. till late March, she met my dad by coincidence.. my dad, being curious of what we youngsters have been doing and what so ever.. started a conversation with her.. she, likewise.. talk with him.. i wasn't very sure of the content.. for i wasn't there in the first place.. i was working at a restaurant at a sub-urban restaurant then.. but it left my dad fuming mad when proceeding home.. was then that i came back from work.. my dad confronted me and blabbering about my spendthrift behaviour and blah blah blah (i couldn't remember that well anymore..).. and the last thing he do.. a BIG tight slap on my face.. i only recalled that i am being wronged from now.. i was crying utterly and land myself sleepless.. i also remembered tat i overdosed pills which will land myself poisoned or have effect on me for overdosage.. and i waited throughout the night.. hoping that it would take effect on me.. and land myself in the hospital.. for i wanted to prove that i am gravely wronged.. nothing happen in the end.. i only felt a tinklish dizziness.. the next day back at school.. i just take nothing happen.. She.. on the other hand.. made everything seems normal and fine, like any other day.. i was hoping that she would come clarify with me.. or even.. at least tell me the content.. but with disappointment.. she did not.. till when i started to display " bAcKsTabBeR.. i hAtE yOu~!" in my msn nick.. her guilt couldn't hold her any longer i guess.. she started to confront me and blabbered about the incidence.. she did not realised that i wasn't referring to her, but someone else.. being rather paranoid she began to take up the mindset that, i am referring her as the backstabber.. conflict resulted when i could not take up her strong words.. and ridiculous logics.. i fumed.. and it marked the start of a war.. knowing that i could not outtalk her, i only managed to handle a few chunk of those hurtful phrases.. each.. hissing and misunderstood everything i have done for her.. vexed.. i raged out my anger all at once within a phrase.. and blocked her immediately.. hoping that both of us will cool down this way..
the beauty exposed ;
Monday, September 26, 2005
Let's sent our condolences to our dearest Jehan.. her grandmother went somewhere faraway.. she's uber sad... awww.. just hugged her.. hope she'll feel better.. a friendly gesture.. let it be.. whatever will be.. will be.. this entry is soley for her.. and dedicated to her grandma..
If You Get There Before I Do
I read a note my grandma wrote back in nineteen twenty-three.
Grandpa kept it in his coat, and he showed it once to me.
He said,"Boy, you might not understand, but a long, long time ago,Grandma's daddy didn't like me none, but I loved your Grandma so.
"We had this crazy plan to meet and run away together.
Get married in the first town we came to, and live forever.
But nailed to the tree where we were supposed to meet, insteadOf her.
I found this letter, and this is what it said.
If you get there before I do, don't give up on me.
I'll meet you when my chores are through, I don't know how long I'll be.
But I'm not gonna let you down, darling wait and see.
And between now and then, till I see you again,I'll be loving you.
Love, me.
I read those words just hours before my Grandma passed away,In the doorway of a church where me and Grandpa stopped to pray.
I know I'd never seen him cry in all my fifteen years.
But as he said these words to her, his eyes filled up with tears.
If you get there before I do, don't give up on me.
I'll meet you when my chores are through.
I don't know how long I'll be.
But I'm not gonna let you down, darling wait and see.
And between now and then, till I see you again,I'll be loving you.
Love, me.
Between now and then, till I see you again,I'll be loving you.
Love, me.
the beauty exposed ;
Sunday, September 25, 2005
Well.. the funfair was prove to be a failure.. it's wasn't fun afterall.. i thought it would be romantic in a two person ride on a ferris wheel.. the feeling..?! yucks.. ugly.. it's was damn boring.. i was the one paying.. 7.50 bucks per head.. i rather go for a spin in that AIRFORCE 1.. upon seeing it at the first sight.. i was amaze by it.. stunned.. and drooling for the shocking feeling.. well.. but it serve me right for wearing a mini and filmsy skirt.. for the grass field is muddy and squashy.. dun wanna dirty my pants if i am wearing it.. there goes another wasted time of my life.. anyway.. if you all happened to drop by YewTee, go for a spree.. i am sure it's damn fun.. but anyway.. i still insist you guys to take that ferris wheel.. why..? one of the guy in charge of it is damn cute loh.. typical guys found at orchard area.. trendy cut and charisma is there.. woohoo.. well.. i bet that if i were to attain contact number from him.. i wouldn't be sure which side of queue will i be at.. so.. there goes another chance of knowing another hunk.. hmm.. Jie in the first place, wanna tease me by getting the number from him; for me.. well.. i just turn it off.. not that keen anyway.. i am attempting the other rides next week.. what shall i wear then..? duhz.. have to spent time again.. digging out apparels to wear.. i got myself hurt for the week.. morning.. archery.. two obvious bruises on my armes.. thanx to the string.. duhz.. and i had a fall while rollerskating.. another thing.. he scratch me! i am wounded here and there..
the beauty exposed ;
Friday, September 23, 2005
well.. i have renew my blog.. no longer those with japanese names de character in my so-called stories anymore.. why? guess the passion just died off.. initially wanna start up a teeny mini life story of myself.. but i don't wanna land myself pondering about the past anymore.. yes.. i loved my ex.. once again.. i specified the word.. LOVED.. no longer like them anymore.. so does that apply to Shaun.. i have down grade him to little infactuaction i had.. as for Shaun.. i guess.. i should just leave him aside..
the beauty exposed ;
